Freeda’s Birth Story - part 1

Ever since I knew how the babies are born, it terrified me. I wanted to have babies, but why it must be so difficult to get them into this world? 😂

I believe that the idea of something big, such as a baby's head, going through something small, such as a vagina, must be terrifying for many people.

Later in my life, when I accepted the nature and power of a woman's body, I realized how amazing birth is. I hoped that one day I can experience this process as natural as it could be.

When we got pregnant, I knew that here in Taiwan giving birth naturally and without medication is not trending that much as it is in the US or Europe. I knew that I’d have to fight for things I want or don’t want to be done to me and my baby. For that reason, I and my husband had to be ready and educated in the birthing business.

Even before I got pregnant, I started working on my research. At that time I was taking a train to go to work and I spent about two hours on the way, three days a week. I was planning to get some books about pregnancy and birth, so I‘d spend my time on the train reading about pregnancy and birth. Then I discovered the magic of podcasts! I totally fell in love with an American podcast The Birth Hour, where women from all around the world (mostly from the US though) share their birth experiences.

First, I thought that it would just be interesting to hear different birth stories from different women. Later, I realized that it is also very educating and empowering. Sometimes I heard medical terms that I didn’t know, so later I just look them up on Google. I‘ve learned about all medical interventions, complications, or scenarios that can happen while giving birth or being pregnant. After hundreds of episodes, I’ve been absolutely sunk in the whole birth process.

I felt like I know everything that can happen to me and my baby and it made me calmer. The podcast also helped me to speak up for myself and my baby in front of the doctors. I was ready to give birth naturally and I was convinced that everything will go exactly as I want to.

There are many things they will tell you as a first-time mother. Usually, first babies come later than expected and after loooong painful labor. I was ready for the worst possible scenario, even though my husband had a very different image of our birth story: “It will start at night, we will go to the hospital in the morning and the baby will be born soon after that.” I loved that picture and I wished for it from the bottom of my heart. He was telling this plan to our baby every day, so he/she could get ready.

At the beginning of the pregnancy, our doctor, the head of the OBGYN department in the local Buddhist hospital, told us that according to the sonograph the due date is July 14th. My period application, which I used for tracking my periods and ovulation, calculated the due date for July 9th. My husband’s birthday is July 8th, I thought it’d be cool if the baby is born around that time. I also felt that there is no way the baby will come that late as July 14th, and as the pregnancy progressed I was getting very sure about it.

On Monday, June 15th we went for a prenatal check-up, I was 36 weeks pregnant. All of my previous checkups were on Mondays. After the checkup, my husband always went to teach and I waited for him at 7-eleven ( usually reading, writing my paper, or getting ready for teaching). The doctor said that from now one we will be having checkups every week and we asked him to switch them to another day because it became very tiring for me to wait for my husband to finish his class. He agreed and scheduled our next visit on Friday 26th.

After that Monday I started preparing food for our baby shower that was happening on Sunday. The Friday before the shower we had sex and I started spotting a bit. I knew that it is perfectly normal towards the end of the pregnancy but my husband said that we are not doing it again until the baby comes. Haha...

The baby shower went well, everyone had fun, we got a load of diapers and brought home loads of leftover food. I was super tired but I wanted to finish all the clean-ups before I go to bed. My husband literally pushed me on the couch and forced me to rest before cleaning the kitchen. I rested, cleaned, and went to bed early, with a plate full of food.

I forgot to mention that around that time it was super hot here. The sun was up most of the days and the temperature indoors was unbearable without AC or a fan. About that time I started feeling very pregnant and a little uncomfortable. Finally right? :D

A new week started. The last week of work for my husband before the summer vacation. I was telling the baby that he/she can come anytime after that week. The weather was horrible and I wished I could just dip myself in the swimming pool. On Tuesday I wanted to go to the river when my husband gets back from work but it didn’t happen. I told him that we really have to go to the river or I’d die from the heat. So on Wednesday evening I cooked enough pasta so I don’t have to cook the following day, we took the dog, we met with friends and we went to the river. The water was so cool, I didn’t even want to leave. On the way back home in the car, I got some mild contractions, but I didn’t pay much attention to it, thinking that they’re just Braxton Hicks, pretty common for the last trimester.

We got home, ate the pasta and I noticed that I’m losing some mucus. Again, I knew that losing a mucus plug could last for days or even weeks so I didn’t even get excited. However, I was happy that something was happening by itself. Later that night we went to buy some junk food - fried tofu sticks and chocolate ice cream. I remember telling my husband while we waited for the tofu that I just want to go home and lay down because I was getting a little uncomfortable.

At home, I ate almost the whole bucket of ice cream. Around midnight we went to bed and we watched a movie, I got very hungry again around 1am. That surprised me because I ate a lot the whole evening. If I just knew that my body was getting ready the whole time. :) I ate some nasty noodles and around 2am we went to sleep. Before that, I took a selfie with my huge belly with my husband‘s phone while he was taking shower. I also told myself that tomorrow I will pack my hospital bag, just in case...

At 4am I woke up, cramping. “No surprise after all the food I ate,” I thought and I rushed to the bathroom. I spent a while in there, having cramps in my stomach and emptying my bowels... Haha sorry for TMI... :D After that I went back to bed, thinking that my stomach got irritated because I ate liters of ice cream.

Another cramp woke me up in about 30 minutes, followed by fluid leaking on the bed. Oops... that’s not the ice cream work. I went to the bathroom again, turned on the shower, took my phone, and started timing the contractions with my Ovia app. I was convinced that this could last for hours. To my surprise, the contractions were coming strong and every 5 minutes. ”Wait, this is not supposed to happen so fast”.

Still not realizing that I‘m actually in labor, I went to wake up my husband and as I sat on the bed, more amniotic fluid leaked out of me.

I touched him gently because I knew that he would jump out of the bed scared like always when I have to wake him up.

”Babe, please calm down, but it is happening,” I said calmly. He sat up and asked me what we should do, after that, I rushed to the bathroom having another contraction. We spent a few minutes there together then we decided to go for walk.

Funny thing, most of the birth stories go like “The labor started with mild contractions, so to speed it up and kill the time, we went for a walk then we had a nice breakfast together.“ That was my idea of labor, being home, walking around with our dog, and watching Netflix while dealing with contractions.

So we went for a walk... Hah... I was having contractions every five meters so we didn’t even leave the path that leads to our house. I commanded that we’re going back inside the house to get ready and pack the hospital bag (I wanted to pack it that day anyway right? :D ).

Then I went back to the bathroom and my poor husband was running around and packing the bag accordingly to the list on my phone. In the meantime he was timing my contractions when I screamed “Now!” or “Another one!” he pressed start when I screamed “Done!” or “Finished!” he stopped the timing.

While I was having problem to wrap my head around the whole situation and how fast everything is happening, he was the best birth partner I could ever dream of. He was calm like never before and his level of multitasking was on the top.

At one point I moved from the bathroom to the bedroom. I remember being on my hands and knees on the bed and in between contractions I was directing my husband what else to pack. As the contractions speeded up, I told him that we would have to go to the hospital asap. At that point, I still thought that we can make it on our own, even though the idea of sitting down in the car was freaking me out.

The bag was almost packed, I got a very painful contraction that actually made me bite on one of our stuffed animals. Then, as I realized later, I hit a transition phase. For those who don’t know, the transition phase is the final stage of labor when the cervix is about to be fully opened and the baby starts descending the birth canal... aka the last stage before you push the baby out.

So as the transition started the contractions changed dramatically from painful stomach cramps to cramps that forced my whole body to push the baby down. With the first one, more water came out on the floor and I pooped the beautiful colorful dress that I chose to give birth in :D Yes, that is the reality of labor, no shame :)

I undress and went to the bathroom again, before that happened I told my husband that we won’t make it to the hospital so he better calls the ambulance. He dialed the 119 (Taiwanese emergency number, like reversed American 911 haha), explained to the dispatcher what is happening. The dispatcher started asking more questions and I started yelling something like “Tell him to shut up and send the car!”. Of course, at that moment I didn’t know that the car is already on the way.

To be continued....